Things married mom is obsessed with during the holidays.

Hi guy, married mom here. Sorry is a blog isn't slacking we have been so busy with the holidays. So in honor of the holidays here's my list of things I'm obsessed with during the holiday season. Expect our blog to pick back up after this crazy holiday season is over.

1. Eggnog! Because its delicious.

2. Gingerbread. It reminds me of going to the old pastry shop that use to be open in town that I would always get a gingerbread man at with my grandmother.

3. Pandora Christmas radio. It makes everything I'm doing more festive have a wonderful Christmas music playing in the background.

4. Snowball fights with my son.

5. Hot cocoa and cuddles after said snowball fights.

6. Decorating!

7. Holiday baking I love the cookies the snowman cupcakes the food Christmas dinner. This is unfortunate for my waistline.

8. Getting to play The Santa Clause card when my kid is acting up. You better cut that out or you'll be on the naughty list.

9. Wrapping presents. I love being able to see the surprise enjoy on my son's face when he unwraps them.

10. And most of all spending time with family and Friends. Doing all the crazy things that needs to get done for Christmas.

Are we raising rats?

We have listened to our children run around together for a weekend sleepover. We've had blanket forts in the living room, rearranged a bedroom, donated toys to Goodwill, cooked and baked like crazy, done 10 loads of laundry, and two sinkfuls of dishes 4 times a day. If that wasn't enough of a workload we are in the midst of a tattling phase. Every 2 minutes one of our children are running over screaming to us in that whiny sing-song rhythm that so and so did something. The something is almost always the most idiotic thing... something you don't even tattle about. "MOMMMMMM! MOMMMMM! They're playing with a babyyyy dollllllllllll!!!!!!!!!!" And your point is???? Seriously, all the screaming could make you think they're getting their eyes poked out every 43 1/2 seconds. Give me a break.

No, seriously.... We really need one.

So we were talking about, of course, solutions to the tattling game, how to discourage it etc... We still are clueless so if any of you have hints PLEASE leave them in the comment section!

We have been friends since the 1st grade, and not once could we remember throwing each other in front of the hypothetical bus in hopes of getting the other in trouble. We don't remember what our parents did for the problem because we never had the problem. True friendship comes with some spats but why our children in the last generation or two have thought of tattling as a fun game, why they get enjoyment out of the other being punished or by being told "there is nothing wrong with that go work it out nicely"... Not a clue.

When we grew up, we had our friends' backs. We played outside for hours on end, coming in for the occasional bathroom break or meal but we went right back out. If one was going to get in trouble, we went down with the ship even if we had nothing to do with it. Even if the excuse was so ridiculous or off the wall crazy, we would glare a look like "really? That's the story we're going with?" and then play along completely no matter the consequence. I don't care if your friend was on the opposite side of the house and you don't have a clue what's going down, you hear a parent yelling and book it to the scene-whatever happened, you are going to try to talk yourselves out of it or get the punishment as a team--working together, true til the end, sink or swim friendship. Even if you weren't there...

The two of us try daily to instill old fashioned values of good friendship, how to use manners & common sense, plenty of outside & exercise time, art projects, cooking projects, learning new languages, using imagination, learning to work together, and the list goes on & on. They're turning out pretty darn well. We always get complimented on their behavior or how smart they are when we're at stores or restaurants. We even get the occasional "You're a good mom, you're doing a good job" from random strangers that observe and listen how we interact with our children. But for whatever reason this tattle tale game of fun & headaches has started in the last couple of months the moment we get back home for playtime.

The worse part is, we know it's a phase. It's going to last a little while but then they will grow into another annoying habit shortly after this was has gone away. There has got to be ways to get the phase shortened so we don't do this for the next 16 years.

Why can't we just send our kids outside to play for hours like in the good ole days?


-Married Mom (MM) and Single Mom (SM)

No Post Today Folks!

Spending time with my family, have a happy Thanksgiving everyone!

A new pre-Thanksgiving tradition!

Don't you just love the internet? Millions of morons and geniuses in one place! We stumbled across a brilliant idea that we wish we could take the credit for and started a new pre-Thanksgiving tradition.

A Charlie Brown Thanksgiving theme night! We did it last night, but only because there was a giant rain/wind storm coming in our area today so we were threatened with power outages and all that fun stuff. Anyway, back to the point.

Make the couch or bedroom with TV all comfy with pillows and blankets. Throw the kids in their cozy pajamas and then the magic starts...

Put on the movie "A Charlie Brown Thanksgiving" and while the kids are watching that, you go into the kitchen. Prepare toast with butter, a bowl of jelly beans, some stove top jiffy pop (it's way more fun!), a bag of pretzels and some ice cream sundaes for afterwards! Everything they eat at Charlie Browns Thanksgiving Feast! We served it up to the kids just as the guests were arriving at Charlie Brown's house. Their eyes lit up and they kept gasping over their plates having the same exact thing! We actually ended up watching the movie several times while we munched on our feast, lots of cuddles, lots of laughs and many great memories. We can't wait to do this each and every year- after all having our friends and family to spend time together is truly what I consider the biggest reason to be thankful! #thankful #thanksgivingtraditions #familytime

Happy Thanksgiving from Mean Mommy Memoirs!

10 Things We Are Thankful For.

In the spirit of Thanksgiving we have decided to prepare our list of 10 things we are thankful for. Enjoy.

10. Netflix, for having kid shows on demand and on repeat for those times when mommy really needs a shower.

9. Electricity, because at the moment almost 5000 people in my area are without it.

8. Lysol, because our children are disgusting little snot monsters this time of year.

7. Diaper wipes, for quick clean ups of almost any mess.

6. Empty threats, because if you don't cut that out I am going to send you to live in the jungle like an animal where you belong!

5. Coffee. Because Caffeine.

4. Wine. Enough Said.

3. Yoga pants and hoodies, because they are really real clothes, so stop judging.

2. Happy and Healthy children, because without them I would have to go out and get a real job, and my life would be not as exciting and my house would be clean. Why would I want that?

1. Family and Friends, who love us and support us not matter what. People that we can talk to and count on to offer good advice, sometimes. And will always do what they can to be helpful. And we can occasionally pawn our little monsters off on them.

The importance of taking breaks...

When your day starts with a mess, fills in with screaming, and ends with a large bottle of whine after bedtime with no hope for a better tomorrow... well, that's just every day. I have no magic cure to end days like that. But I do know that if I didn't harness the power to walk away and close myself in a room to breathe for 4 minutes every now and then that I'd be a full time resident in the local looney bin.

Kids take and take and take some more all day long. They take our energy, our patience, our brains, our muscles... and abuse them. All day long, every day of the week. Those moments when I'm ready to blow a head gasket or I feel like bundling up in the fetal position when I spot the spilled milk all over the floor I just swept and mopped, I like to leave the room. I excuse myself and tell my children to play in another room and not to enter the room with the mess & I will clean it in a few moments after I take a quick break. This isn't like every mess holy crap I can't handle this, but I know you've had a day (or 50 days) worth of insanity in your household from the moment you woke up to the moment your 18 year sentences rest their head on the pillow. They look so sweet and angelic sound asleep, and my love for them just flows. But I remember the look of the devil in their eyes for the last 13 hours so I'm also feeling very thankful that I can finally breathe.

It's okay to take a break. When you're overwhelmed, frustrated, upset, distraught, whatever the emotion--you start to parent out of those feelings versus what the situation actually warrants for discipline. We can take that accident and turn it into a teachable moment if we step in the locked bathroom for a few moments to compose ourselves like rational, understanding, loving beings instead of half mom-half fire breathing-flesh eating demon dragons.
Ever screamed or over reacted over a situation just because you felt so pissed off? Yeah, we all have. We're human. And sometimes it's okay, but sometimes it's time for a quick breather. We have to teach our kids right from wrong, actions and consequences. If they messed up, they need to know.

I don't drink often but I can tell you without a drink, I'd be finding some Xanax or Ativan in the local ER having a nervous break down. Take a moment at the end of the day after your kid is asleep, leave the housework alone (trust me it's not going anywhere, you know nobody else is going to do it! HA!), and go find something you really like to do. A movie or show, a puzzle, a video game, an exercise routine, a book, a nap, a bubble bath.... Breathe easy, forget about all the bullshit in your life for a few minutes and give back to yourself. Without you, there would be nobody to run your house or your life. Everything would fall to shambles and be a chaotic mess. And for goodness sake, go pour yourself a drink.

The joy of raising daughters

As a single mother to two little girls, I get the privledge of playing dress up princesses, brides, mermaids, hair dresser, and every other girly thing you can imagine. My daughters are the extreme of girly. I didn't intentionally do this. I tried to encourage going to get muddy or diving in the sandbox but after age 2 or so I started hearing things like "I can't do that, I'll ruin my beautiful shoes!" or "No thanks, I'll be on the swings pretending to be a fairy!" My youngest can get down and dirty occasionally but the older she gets, the more she phases out of it. My oldest... she's a completely different story. All girl. Not an ounce of boy in her. The moment we walk through the front door she runs to her dress up box, strips her clothes off and puts the frilly dresses on, complete with rings, bracelets, necklaces, and high heels. If that wasn't bad enough she goes over to her pretend beauty set and sits in front of the mirror with her pretend curling iron to girl her hair. She then runs to whatever room I'm in, throws her hands up in the air, pops a hip, flashes a smile while yelling "Taaa Daaaaa! Look how beautiful I am!" This never gets old to her. And every time I laugh and think about how I ended up with a fruit cake girly girl like her for a daughter.

We get to do our nails up all pretty together. Okay it's not always pretty but it's the thought that counts. This is one of my favorite mother daughter activities if the timing and patience is right. We sit still together, talking about silly things or what their favorite part of the day was and everything in between.

They love to bake and cook with me. I'm one of those people that believe your food is fuel and what you put in really matters. I like to make delicious food that is healthy. The girls are all about putting on their mini aprons that match mine, pulling up a couple of chairs, and adding ingredients to make the food. The final product is something they are always eager to eat since they helped make it. It's not always a time efficient way to cook when you start from scratch then add two little helpers to the mix but those little moments add up to a little bit of extra time with Mommy where there are lots of please, thank you, and good jobs going around. That adds up to a yummy meal and very happy children.

Tea parties. Sitting down at a mini table in a tiny chair to sip tea with my little ladies is always fun. I get to teach them about proper table etiquette and manners while at home in a comfortable environment. Whenever we go out to eat at a restaurant they are so well behaved it usually gets commented on my complete strangers. I attribute this to all the tea party time.

While my two princesses can make a tornado in the house faster than I can pee, they are pretty eager to help clean up the messes. We sing cleaning songs, dance around pretending to be snow white, and make a game to see how fast the room can be cleaned up. All of those things combined turn clean up time into something my children don't dread... well most of the time.

Girls aren't afraid to talk about how they're feeling. If they're mad or angry, they let you know. If they're sad or get their feelings hurt, you know about it. Boys don't seem to do this as much, they don't care to talk out problems. My girls will come to me and say whatever happened, that it really hurt their feelings and ask if I can help them or just want to sit with me for a little break to get some Mommy love.

Which leads me to say how awesome it is that girls still love to cuddle their Mom even after they grow out of the baby phase. Most boys turn a certain age and then they're done with it. I love the moments my girls decide to climb on the couch with me to snuggle in and ask me to read a story or just want to talk. Little sporadic reminders that they love and care even though they just trashed the entire second floor before they climbed in your lap.

Girls say the sweetest things. For no apparent reason they remind me that they love me, I'm the best mommy ever, and they never want to leave me. That last part gets me every time, and depending on how the day went it's either a comforting or terrifying thought. I love those moments they glance up and say "I want to be a Mommy just like you when I get big!" You just don't get little thoughtful moments every day like that from a boy, they're too worried about trucks to think about how awesome their mom is.

I'm not saying it's all rainbows and butterflies. Having two girls just over a year apart is stressful, full of high pitch screams of joy or dismay, and is a lot of work. But that's a whole different post :-)

-Single Mommy (SM)