As a single mother to two little girls, I get the privledge of playing dress up princesses, brides, mermaids, hair dresser, and every other girly thing you can imagine. My daughters are the extreme of girly. I didn't intentionally do this. I tried to encourage going to get muddy or diving in the sandbox but after age 2 or so I started hearing things like "I can't do that, I'll ruin my beautiful shoes!" or "No thanks, I'll be on the swings pretending to be a fairy!" My youngest can get down and dirty occasionally but the older she gets, the more she phases out of it. My oldest... she's a completely different story. All girl. Not an ounce of boy in her. The moment we walk through the front door she runs to her dress up box, strips her clothes off and puts the frilly dresses on, complete with rings, bracelets, necklaces, and high heels. If that wasn't bad enough she goes over to her pretend beauty set and sits in front of the mirror with her pretend curling iron to girl her hair. She then runs to whatever room I'm in, throws her hands up in the air, pops a hip, flashes a smile while yelling "Taaa Daaaaa! Look how beautiful I am!" This never gets old to her. And every time I laugh and think about how I ended up with a fruit cake girly girl like her for a daughter.
We get to do our nails up all pretty together. Okay it's not always pretty but it's the thought that counts. This is one of my favorite mother daughter activities if the timing and patience is right. We sit still together, talking about silly things or what their favorite part of the day was and everything in between.
They love to bake and cook with me. I'm one of those people that believe your food is fuel and what you put in really matters. I like to make delicious food that is healthy. The girls are all about putting on their mini aprons that match mine, pulling up a couple of chairs, and adding ingredients to make the food. The final product is something they are always eager to eat since they helped make it. It's not always a time efficient way to cook when you start from scratch then add two little helpers to the mix but those little moments add up to a little bit of extra time with Mommy where there are lots of please, thank you, and good jobs going around. That adds up to a yummy meal and very happy children.
Tea parties. Sitting down at a mini table in a tiny chair to sip tea with my little ladies is always fun. I get to teach them about proper table etiquette and manners while at home in a comfortable environment. Whenever we go out to eat at a restaurant they are so well behaved it usually gets commented on my complete strangers. I attribute this to all the tea party time.
While my two princesses can make a tornado in the house faster than I can pee, they are pretty eager to help clean up the messes. We sing cleaning songs, dance around pretending to be snow white, and make a game to see how fast the room can be cleaned up. All of those things combined turn clean up time into something my children don't dread... well most of the time.
Girls aren't afraid to talk about how they're feeling. If they're mad or angry, they let you know. If they're sad or get their feelings hurt, you know about it. Boys don't seem to do this as much, they don't care to talk out problems. My girls will come to me and say whatever happened, that it really hurt their feelings and ask if I can help them or just want to sit with me for a little break to get some Mommy love.
Which leads me to say how awesome it is that girls still love to cuddle their Mom even after they grow out of the baby phase. Most boys turn a certain age and then they're done with it. I love the moments my girls decide to climb on the couch with me to snuggle in and ask me to read a story or just want to talk. Little sporadic reminders that they love and care even though they just trashed the entire second floor before they climbed in your lap.
Girls say the sweetest things. For no apparent reason they remind me that they love me, I'm the best mommy ever, and they never want to leave me. That last part gets me every time, and depending on how the day went it's either a comforting or terrifying thought. I love those moments they glance up and say "I want to be a Mommy just like you when I get big!" You just don't get little thoughtful moments every day like that from a boy, they're too worried about trucks to think about how awesome their mom is.
I'm not saying it's all rainbows and butterflies. Having two girls just over a year apart is stressful, full of high pitch screams of joy or dismay, and is a lot of work. But that's a whole different post :-)
-Single Mommy (SM)
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